I run a decently active private Discord server exclusively for bird-identifying folks! And I'm queer and autistic myself so it's definitely inclusive. My tag is in my profile, if you're interested feel free to hit me up in DMs and I can get you an invite :>
I have found Kinmunity.com's Discord server to be quite a friendly place! But you do have to join Kinmunity.com to join the Discord unfortunately. Though this alone does ensure its security. They are also definitely LGBT inclusive!
i'm the owner of a pretty chill, but not inactive, alterhuman server! it's called the alterhuman abode, i can send you the link in private if you aren't able to find it and want to join